A letter to the People from the Confederation of Criminals and Thugs!

Look all youse guys, we here at the CC&T feel just like those Democrats do about all you civilians owning guns! You need to turn them in, cause frankly they’re making our jobs that much more of a problem to do. (Our members work at all sorts of odd hours and getting shot by some homeowner with a gun is messing up our healthcare packages big time). You all should listen to your President and turn your firearms in today! Let the police handle people like us. You see, they are trained to give us every consideration and benefit of the doubt, no matter how bad one of us may have f’d someone up!

What it all comes down to is that we are just doing what the President wants the Nation to do. That is the redistribution of wealth directly to poor people like us! Seriously, the only difference between Obama and a dink like Jimmy the Hood is that Obama’s methods take forever, whereas Jimmy can improve his bottom line in just one nights work! Now that’s what we like to call redistribution at the speed of light!

So, listen up dummies, when an icon like Harry Reid (who is protected by guns 24/7) tells you people what’s good for you to do! You all are ‘too dumb to be handling guns’! (Hey! That rhymes).. Ya’ll do that and we promise we won’t beat the living crap out of you when next we pay youse a personal visit at three in the morning!

Billy the Weasel

CEO CC&T